When I meet up with friends and we discuss the topic of dating, one source of comic relief comes from someone’s suggestion to check out eHarmony.com or match.com.  (btw, for koreans, you can also check out www.koreancupid.com)  The concept of using the internet to meet someone to date is relatively new concept and for a lot of my friends an uncomfortable one.   Many swore they have never used it, but did hear success stories of “others” who have used it.  I was  so intrigued by mixed reviews that I decided to investigate it a bit futher.

I went through a couple sites that seem to be 2 of the most popular dating websites, eHarmony.com and match.com.  The first thing I noticed on these sites was how simple it is, at first, to sign up and find a match.  All you have to do is tell the site your zipcode, email, age, and if you are looking for a man or woman.  But, there’s a catch.  Once you sign up, it’s going to cost you money to really be able to use the site for what it’s really known for, matchingmaking.  The business model of both eHarmony.com and match.com is that they have propritetary methods that can match two people who would be good partners.

Unfortunately, to get to the point of matchmaking, there is a rather lengthy survey that one must fill out.  It took me about 30 minutes to do, but it’s the detailed level of questioning that helps the websites suggest potentially good matches.  The questions include everything from your income, to your religion, to how important certain attributes are of a potential partner.  As a side note, instead of just having Asian as a check box under ethnicity, there’s a separate category for Korean!

After going through the process of both sites, it gave me more confidence that these sites actually might work.  Of course, it depends on whether people are being honest, but from the responses I received, as a test, it was encouraging that a lot of the suggested matches were people I would be more than open to go on a first date with or at least have a conversation.  Another benefit of the site is once you invest the intial time, you just sit back and relax as the site suggests matches which you have the option to pursue or not.  It’s truly a no strings attached (minus the nomial fees) way of meeting new people for any purpose.  I know a couple of friends who use it just to meet people, another who is searching for a spouse, and another to just find physical partners.  In all the cases, they expressed to me that while not all matches are superb, a lot of them are rather legitimate.  One of my friends also pointed out that he can discrimate on any criteria he wants and keep that information to himself.

As more people give at least one of the sites a try, they will get comfortable with the idea of being introduced to a partner by a website vs. a friend is normal.  I don’t think it should be a replacement since meeting people face to face is a great direct way in building a relationship, but more than enough people have been married thanks to eHarmony and match.com that for those who use the site with discretion, it could be a great resource.

-Johnny

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